Why do Relationships fail?

Why do relationships fail?

In this technological era, where meeting and connecting to new people or the same old people is just a click away and where talking to a person  who is miles away from you is so convenient. The digitization coupled with mobility have shrunken the distance to a great extent; strangely successful relationships are hard to find.

While, this century can rightly be termed as "The Digital Era", why are the humans failing to nurture their relationships.

The merit of digital world seems to have played down upon the emotional warmth between two people. Why? Perhaps, the saying too much of anything is bad. This can be one of the many reasons behind failures.

To our surprise, our grandparents who used to choose their life partners without even seeing each other, can have a successful marriage and also have built generations on it. Then why is today's youth who gets the liberty to see, even virtually talk to each other, know each other still runs to failure. There are many reasons that come to my mind for these changing circumstances. Firstly, our grandparents valued their parents immensely and they believed in the ideology of not going against them. But in today's times this trend can just be considered as an orthodox mentality. Then came the generation of out parents who did not follow their parents blindly, but they chose their life partners as per their choices. Many people chose love marriages and many chose an arranged marriages still they had a successful marriages. Why? Because they were certain about the feelings they had for their life partners. They understood the mere fact that life is not  a bed of roses. And with the changing times, situations change but not the feeling of togetherness or the vows of marriage they took. They can actually be called pioneers of the term "Happily Ever After."

Sadly, today's generation Y is too forward and practical. For them, parental advice doesn't count, because for them Internet is that tool from where they can get information and solutions to anything and everything. But sadly they fail on the terminologies such as compromise, faith, patience and togetherness. If it can fit well to you, it's yours. But being in a relationship with a person is not like changing clothes! For any relation to sustain, you need to adjust. The sense of compromising something for someone you love is missing because practical mindset heaves upon the emotional quotient. People have competitions on how many girlfriends or boyfriends they have had. But none of them, comes and says like," Its been 5 years  and I have been dating this fellow, and still every day I find a new person in him/ her." The basic ability to have faith in another person is missing.

Also, to stop dealing with divorces and more legal proceedings, this generation have even adapted methods like live-in relationships. I am not trying to say that live-ins are wrong but they are wrong as an option to escape from divorces. You meet a person, you like him, you aren't sure how will you manage with him your entire life, and hence you live-in with that person. But, if your emotions are true, and if you have kept your trust in the right person, it is always going to end up in a marriage. For us, Live-ins are the shortcut to Marriage, responsibility and care still sufficing the basic needs of sex and fun. Marriages are a sense of togetherness. A partner who is life long there to stand by and believe  in you and to get the best out of you. 

       Life comes with a purpose and to achieve that one must adhere to these basics. And if every person out there starts living it in that way with an aid of technology, nourishing and valuing relationships. This world can surely be a better place. Afterall who likes breaking up?! 

The Little Happiness.

The little happiness.

"What is happiness?" wonders my perplexed mind in its most thoughtful phase.After pondering over it for a while, I get a reply. Mind says,"Happiness is when I am happy." "And when are you happy, mister mind?" I ask innocently. Mind replies earnestly, " I am happy, whenever you want me to be." This surprised me. 

After hours of pondering over mind's reply, I understood the message. Happiness is a state of mind , state of peace and state of relaxation. Anything which is sad, depressing, cruel or impolite is the opposite of happiness.

But, then in the world full of heart breaks, cruelty, poverty and dishonesty how am I supposed to keep my mind happy?! And, there came an answer, Happiness lies in the joy of little things. The feeling of first ray of light on your face in the morning. The getting drenched in the first monsoon rains. The thrill and the chills that you get in a roller coaster ride. These things come in our lives as we struggle to grow up, we undermine these small pleasures of life in the search for luxuries.

Have you ever wondered how happy you were when you were a child? Hah! Those carefree days, endless playing,no watch on the clock, mummy's cuddles to dad's dreams, grandfather's gifts to grandma's stories, munching snacks whole day, eating sweets and ice-creams and from anything to everything. Amidst all this we knocked the door of school.

A bit of new learning got submerged into our regular schedule and life was again the same happy go lucky journey. 

As we grew up, we started making friends, watching movies , hanging out with friends and still the glimpse of happiness in the eye remains as it is. Soon we embarked upon the journey to college and then we realized how wonderful our school days were! At every nook and corner of the college we narrated our school stories to our fellow batch mates.Then came the enchanting and most awaited freshers. Along with these changes we were growing，and with that we developed likes and dislikes for people, things,issues. We soon had an important say to almost everything we came across. While following our friends and siblings, we adapted the environment and went on the search of a life partner. We objectified every opposite gender according to our tastes and judged them. With these we finally chose the one that matches our predicament and started proclaiming it as our crush. Soon, came the awaited friendship. The emergence of a happiness when he did something really nice for you. The feeling when his hands touched yours for the first time. The rush that you felt when you first went out with him. The first date. The first long drive. The first feeling of togetherness. It made you feel alive, every tiny moment and you still claim they were the best days of your life.The time when you graduate. The proud eye of parents when you get your first job. Those naive school, college days memories. The happiness is when you see people around you happy with your achievements.

       With the passing time and our wants to achieve our ambitions, we forget the pleasures of these little things and nor do we find time for them. We run on the needle of watch and sometimes even don't value the happiness that we possess. We are so lost in our aspirations that we forget to celebrate our success, relations and the pastimes.The things that truly make us happy.

Potrayal Of Indian Woman by media.

The portrayal of women in media plays a crucial part in setting the mindset of the society. Now there are some thoughts which will go with the above saying but some would definitely contradict. To some media is just a representation of what society is, while to others media means liberation and power to lead the change. But here we are not going into the counterparts of either of the arguments. The focus is simply on the latter one.

Media has the indomitable power to lead the change! Media means power to communicate to the masses. Media means the power to reflect the happenings, injustices in the society to its people and guide them the path to growth. The merits to media are countless but how many of them have been achieved by media in the past 62 years of Indian Independence. The media maniacs or the journalists might have a lot to say in order to prove the merits of media in the society.

But then why are Indian women still suffering? Why has the so called media never ever tried to portray importance of women in society? Recent statistics show that there is one female raped every 22 minutes in India. Why?The answer to this lies at the inception of democracy. Be it movies, ads or newspapers, Indian women have always been shown suffering. I still recall an advertisement  which had come up during my childhood days. The brand, if I remember correctly,   was Iodex balm. The advertisement showcased the female protagonist cleaning utensils and complaining for her backache. Solution Iodex balm. The manufacturing company and the advertising agency both enjoyed the profits of selling the product by playing it on Indian sentiment.But this gave away a wrong message. And sadly this was just the story of one brand. You can see thousands of such ad films which heave upon the fact of women suffering and thus making business.

Not just advertising, even newspapers and print media are no less in bolstering their support to this wave. A recent example would speak for it. A national award winner at a tender age of 11 for a film, Sweta basu got arrested with the charges of prostitution. What did the media do?

       They leaked images and news regarding the charges on the actress which lead to tarnished her image in the society. But there was not a single newspaper that reported the names of the men who were involved in it. Only the girl got to suffer and the males flew away with the power of money. Who forced the girl to enter into prostitution? Why was she given such a choice to earn money?! Who got her to this path?! The male chauvinist society.Inspite of knowing the fact, media chose to highlight the half truth.Infamous stories about casting couch in glamour world, and the recent incidents of actresses being taunted on sensitive issues in their press conferences just prove that no matter how much we talk about women empowerment for growth and progress of the country but sadly indian women suffer. And media which is a shout out for liberation, the voice of the nation sits in the silence under the dark shade of corruption and selfish business motives.